savoring the year: catching on {7/365}

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5:00 AM

Catching on: have you ever been so caught up in a good cause that you lost sight of the people around you? Take a little time today to lay aside your agenda and listen for what God is asking you.

Since college, tasks can take a priority over people and being an introvert plays in to that. I thrive off solitude and creating, which can be beneficial or destructive in any given circumstance. I am a recovering Type A task oriented person and constantly ask God to open my eyes to those around me, to really see. Especially to see my children. Those closest in proximity and heart.

Taking care of small children can be draining and exhausting and transitions, even the smallest things like upgrading from crib to toddler bed can feel like moving mountains.

Towards the end of summer and beginning of fall Jude, just over eighteen months, decided it was time to make that switch. It was time to get a big boy bed, like his sister's. After climbing out of his crib and refusing to sleep, though he was tired, so unlike himself, it was time to give in. 

My friend, knowing of our predicament, tagged me in a post on a Facebook children's site that was selling an identical bed to my daughter's. Perfect timing. 

We purchased the bed and the sweet lady even threw in a brand new Cinderella dress up dress, which my daughter had just been praying and asking God for a few days before.

The weeks that followed were hard. My son refused to stay in his bed and was tired and crying and I was starting to mirror him, while caring for an infant and active four year old. I was praying Galatians 6:9 regularly: let us not grow weary of doing good, for in the proper time we will reap a harvest and looking for the good because life was good, just harder.  

Early October found me sitting in a prayer room, while a new friend prayed for me and the Holy Spirit reminded me to see my children. To see truly see them. To see their eyes and their needs and their wants. To see their hears. To see past the outbursts and tasks at hand and look at them how He does.

He reminded me that as I delight in my children, he also delights in me. He sees me. He sees them. And it was this beautiful reminder of opening my eyes to my children, not their requests for more snacks or putting them back to bed for the hundredth time but to see them for who they are now and not what they are doing, whether positive or negative. Simply, to love them as they are.

And with that, he gave me new eyes to see each one. Each perfectly formed person, bubbling with personality and laughter and love and a little crazy.

There is a fine line between caring for the tasks of children and putting out fires and enjoying the entirety of mamahood. It is that line that can make it easy to miss out on truly seeing them or hearing their hearts, especially during transitions, which seem to be the only constant. And it just may be, that people the closest are the hardest to truly see, until we stand back and take a breath to focus and ask God to give us a fresh look.


Here's to new sight for the people around you. 
____________________________________________________

This is part of a 365 day blogging series through Savor by Shauna Niequist. If you would like to blog along, whether daily or weekly, I would love to have you for the journey; be sure to link back to the post. And if you are not a blogger, you can join along, too. Just leave your response and answers in the comments.
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